For the most part, I feel I succumb to my frustrations quite easily, especially because presently, I work a “job” that I never leave! When I was a teacher and faced frustrations with either coworkers, students, or parents, I could go home from my 8-5 job and find solace in my quiet house with my wonderful husband. These days, I feel like I clean, cook, break up quibbles, mend toys, discipline, run errands, etc., etc., etc., all with two little girls by my side every step of the way! Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy being at home with my girls and the rewards are immense, but the late night yelps and frequent chasings back to bed (Anna), can add up and get me pretty frustrated! Now, I would call these particular events “surface” frustrations because I have an inner battle and also get upset with myself as a mom, wife, daughter, and friend. When I do things I’m not proud of, when I overreact to a simple problem, when I don’t call someone I know I should, when dinner isn’t “on time,” and when I don’t respond with kindness, I often allow guilt to take place of the confidence and peace I previously had, and that makes me EVEN MORE frustrated!
Some may read this entry and think, “Gee, Christa, it’s so easy. Just give it to God and He’ll take care of it!” Honestly, I KNOW it’s really that easy and that the Lord will take my burden because He cares for me, but I’m one of those who like to just pick it back up again! However, again, I’m a work in progress, relying on the immense grace of a Saviour who experienced frustrations even greater than those I do. Just yesterday, I read in Mark 8:12, “He [Jesus] sighed deeply…” In this passage, Jesus seems increasingly frustrated with those needing more and more signs that He is the Messiah or Son of Man. I’m so glad my Lord knows how I feel, and now my task is to follow in His footsteps in dealing more effectively with them!